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Finance

We Thought Building a House Would Be Simple. We Were So Wrong.

We have a confession to make.

When we started planning our own home build (or renovation—who can tell the difference after six Pinterest boards and a tile sample addiction?), we thought we had it figured out.

We had done the math, watched the HGTV reruns, and confidently said things like:
“Oh, we’ll just budget $400 a square foot. Easy.”

We were riding high on the delusion train. Vision board? Made. Cabinets? Chosen. Mood lighting? Manifested. We were this close to ordering monogrammed doorknobs.

And then… reality hit.

Turns out, building a home is not just picking countertops and paint colors and waiting for your Pinterest dreams to come true.

It’s more like customizing a car—but on steroids.
Are you building a Honda, a BMW, or a full-blown Rolls Royce of a house?

Because yes, technically, it’s all a house. But no, not all houses are created equal.


Here’s the Plot Twist No One Tells You:

You can build a house for $400/sqft or for $1,400/sqft.
The only difference?
Every. Single. Choice. You. Make.

Fixtures. Flooring. Faucets. Cabinetry. Millwork.
Each of these opens a portal to a different budget reality. And don’t get us started on countertops. (We nearly called off the build over quartzite.)

You’re not just picking a house. You’re designing a lifestyle, room by room.

So, yes, you can build a 4,000 sq ft home for $4 million. But you might end up spending 30% of that—$1.2 million—on materials alone. That’s not a flex, that’s just how the math works when you fall in love with hardware that costs more than your first car.


So… Are You Building a Forever Home? Or an Investment Flip?

This question? It changes everything.

Are you building:

  • Your dream house where you plan to host Thanksgiving until you’re 90?
  • Or are you building a beautiful home you’ll sell in 5–10 years for a healthy profit?

If it’s the forever kind, you’ll probably want the dreamy walk-in closet, heated floors, and imported tile. If it’s a flip? You’ll probably want to not overbuild for the neighborhood.

There’s a difference between spending smart and spending emotionally (don’t worry, we’ve done both in the same afternoon).


But Seriously, How Much Should You Spend on Design Finishes?

We asked the design gods (and by that, we mean the contractors, builders, and architects we trust most). Here’s the general wisdom:

  • Total design/material costs: 25–35% of total budget
  • Kitchens: 10–15% of total
  • Primary bathrooms: 5–10% of total
  • Cool light fixtures you saw on Instagram: …Priceless. (Just kidding, $3,200.)

It’s not just “materials”—it’s the things that make your house feel like your house. It’s the mood, the texture, the wow-factor. You’re building an experience.


Final Thought (Before You Panic-Order 37 Marble Samples)

Here’s what we wish someone told us on day one:

Stop asking “how much does it cost?”
Start asking: What is my expectation of the finished product?

Because whether you build a $2M house or a $10M house, every decision has a dollar sign next to it. And the only way to avoid regret is to know what really matters to you.

So go ahead—dream big. Just do it with your eyes (and budget spreadsheets) wide open.And remember: some people are out here launching sports drinks, and you?
You’re building a masterpiece.

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BEHIND THE BRAND

Hi, I'm  Grace.

As a nationally-recognized real estate and design expert, Grace helps people create beautiful homes that are also smart investments. With a love for historic properties and strategic design, she works with her husband, KC, to make the process of buying, selling, and designing feel exciting and approachable—helping clients turn houses into dream homes. Based on Chicago's North Shore.

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